Building Up the Fort

We ended up not talking at all, because Andy was avoiding me and didn't come get Matt at lunch time, which was the time we all assumed the big talk would take place. It's not like I wanted to talk to them. But I did want to straighten things out before something bad happened. Something like today.

Andy and Matt, being Seniors, didn't have to come to school today. Andy's ex-girlfriend did have to come to school. It seems as though when Andy's not there to passively stand up for me, she shows how she really feels. I overheard her and her friends talking about the situation as I walked down the hall. She told me I was dead. Our school is small enough that I would run into her no matter where I hid. Of course, I walked past her again and she glared with the sharpest of glares.

I wasn't going to do anything at first, but I just couldn't stand it. I texted Matt to take my mind off things. And then, I had to tell him something might have been in the works. He needed to know the details. So I told him. I told him about the things I'd heard, the way I felt, how she'd been looking at me. I felt like everybody hated me, especially Andy. I think he was avoiding me because his "ex" girlfriend asked him to.

I don't know what I expected from his and my relationship, but I did expect something. I thought we were going to have some sort of thing. But I understand now. I know that she will always be his first priority, and I don't want to try and compete with that. They're very much together. I'm not going to let my heart get any more cracked by this than it already has.

In lighter news, I'm blogging from my living room again. Sometimes I sit at the Ikea desk in my room and I could stay there for ages. I love having a wireless connection. It's a very beautiful thing, and I'm very thankful of that in this swell storm.