My E-High School

Today, I had to go with my mother to have a congress with the school counselor, not for a behavioral problem, but to decide what exactly is going to be done with my life. Suppose I know I'm going to graduate early, which I do. I have to figure out which classes I'm going to take in person as opposed to summer classes and internet variations on course. I'm pretty scared of the idea of graduating, mostly because I'll need so many credits. You need a full twenty-seven to graduate. And besides that, all twenty-seven of those credits need to impress the college to which you're applying.

Since I spend so much of my "free time" on the internet, I figure that the best way to gain extra credits would be to complete online courses in things I really have no interest in doing with a teacher. For one, Financial Literacy. It's probably a class I really need to take, since I'm the one who tips gratuitously on small charges. I once gave Kyler two dollars and twenty-five cents on a two dollar and seventy-five cent coffee. Honest to God. But anyway, Financial Literacy would be so much easier to just pummel through without having to waste another valuable credit in person. Plus, I hear the teacher-who-also-teaches-Financial-Literacy is a total bitch. That's what I hear.

And then, if I think about taking the meek classes online, I start to think that I could take one of the not-so-meek classes online, like Civics or History, since I'm scared of the man who teaches both of those. If I took enough classes, I could spend my entire Junior year going to electives. Why wouldn't that be pleasant?

Probably, though, a lot of my "free time" at school would be filled. I wouldn't be sitting here in English class writing a meager blog post to satiate my hunger for words, words, words, words, words. I can picture myself carefully chewing those words up and turning them into a mulch. Tummy mulch. It would appear that I am slacking off, but really, I overachieved my way to a place wherein nothing needs to be finished. It is the last day of the term and everything is complete.

It's a very absolute way to feel.

Almost as if I'm leaving high school forever already, which would be so much better than having to stay three more years. But those three years are almost two years. And those two years will go by like cinder sideways blinders over the eyes of a maze. Days are dragging on until whenever I can finally and honestly make my way to the sunny shores of California. I'm going to miss it here. And I think, just maybe, my English teacher is high on something. Either that, or he's just very good-natured today.

Before I close this post, I simply must describe him. He wears mittens with the mitten folded back, so he has little fingertips sticking out of the Minnesota print. Between the two or so pairs of shoes I've seen him wear, he has a pair of grayed Chuck Taylors and splitting checkered Vans. He also maintains a good bit of scruff around his chin, and a wristwatch calculator that he uses to calculate small sums. On my first day at Beast Hollyfood, his hair seemed to have the indie mullet cut, though it has since grown out.

He says things like, "I have a crush on Jane Austen. But she is dead," and he draws bushy eyebrows on pictures of William Shakespeare when we all think he's grading papers. The school's film club is led by him. It was because of this man that I saw the movie Once, the movie that stole the Best Original Song award from Enchanted, and quite frankly, kicked Enchanted's ass. He showed Dr. Strangelove once when half the student body knew school didn't start until 10:30, and the other half was already at school.

This is why I have vowed not to take any English classes through the online program. No matter how desperate for another period of elective magic I become, I will take this man's English class until the day I graduate. Which, hopefully, will be a day or two before my seventeeth birthday.