My Kick, Push, Kick, Push

Unfortunately for me, I'm that kind of person, the kind of person who seriously needs to be on a routine or else I need to be on medication. I formulate my own routine for school, like take these stairs to get to this room and sit in this area, take this hallway to get to this place, et cetera. I can't really help it, it's just comforting to me. Routine even formulates out of summer break. At this time, I watch this show, then go online for this amount of time until this show is on, and then watch the next show. Travel is one of the worst things for me. When I go to meet somebody, I have to call them when I leave and when I get close. I hate having no schedule when I travel. And that is why I am setting a curse upon the Utah Transit Authority from this day forward.

Today is "change day," a massive route change for all buses in Salt Lake and Utah Counties. It's the biggest change in Utah history, I seem to recall. Today is also the last day of my summer. Tomorrow, I must set out on my own to make it to the Freshman Orientation at Strest. I must set out on my own and get there at 7:30 a.m. But here's the thing, UTA just up and decided TO DESTROY THE ROUTE OF MY TRAVEL. No more bus! No more routine! FUCK. I have no idea how I'm supposed to get to school now. Previously, I rode the bus, that route, to the TRAX [UTA's light rail system, an above-ground subway that, like Utah, is white and clean and not menacing in any way] which I rode until my stop, and I would walk. NOPE, SORRY, NO MORE! According to the UTA website "trip planner," there is no bus near my intersection. So I don't know what the hell I'm supposed to do.

I would walk to the TRAX if it weren't so far away. People think that I take the bus because I'm too lazy to walk to the nearest TRAX stop. No, no, no, this is untrue! The nearest TRAX stop is in fact, not that near at all. It's difficult to traverse on foot, I'll say that. And I have indeed traversed it on foot in the past, a traumatic and evil experience that I think of in utter terror, therefore, I do not want to traverse it in even a controlled environment. I was talking to my friend Mac about this conundrum when he suggested I skate the distance.

Now, I must interject. My mom was a skater back in the late eighties, early nineties, a skater goth who had friends and roommates that had piercings and tattoos and hung themselves from things. Her friends were SLC Dogtown skaters and filmmakers with Super 8 cameras. And then she got knocked up, and popped me out of her cootch. Everyone expects me to be really good at skating, because "I have the blood." Well I might have the blood, but I certainly don't have the pulse. I've tried to skate. I've tried and I can't. So I don't want to try. I'd rather take the bus than get hurt just to look "cool," is that so disagreeable?

I'm not a skater. Do I look like a skater? Do I look like I can skate? Yeah, probably. You can't wear a bandanna and expect people not to assume you skate. But honestly. I'm not a skater. I also can't ride a bike for a long distance, and walking makes my ankles hurt. I don't know what to do.
Fuck, whoever said public transportation was good for global warming obviously never had to take the bus at five in the morning.